notes from the road

LAeving on a jet plane

07/28/09 Tuesday

If I was willing to stay here in America longer than I had planned I would have a job with TOMS, a cool company, but not the sort of job that lights my fire. It would be terribly handy to have the money that it would provide me with ($2000 a month) especially as I would be able to live with Ryan and his pals in the commune house where I’d get food and a roof over my head for $380 a month but it seems a little too early to let money dictate my decisions. I’ve come to realize recently that the romantic ‘follow your dreams’ ideals can’t always be had, and that’s not a bad thing. If I were looking after a family now then I probably would have taken the job. A family is far more important than any fleeting idea or dream that I might have. And lets be honest, my idea and plan is far from rock solid especially when compared to a steady income, secure accommodation and wide group of friends.

I’m in LAX now with all 55 pounds of my belongings, A$700 and an idea. And with these assets I aim to get myself by until at the earliest November 21st but hopefully closer to Christmas. If I can do this I will deem the venture a success, if I can’t do it at least I’ve tried and I would have learned a great deal about myself in the process. My biggest fear is that at the first set back I might get scared and give up, but to counter this I’ve got a few tools up my sleeve. First and foremost – I’ve given up the opportunity to have a secure job to throw all I’ve got against the wall and see what sticks, I didn’t give the job up to panda around tip toeing across the daisy field only to return home as soon as I get a prickle in my foot. Secondly, there is a quotation that I heard from a man who I’ve never really thought much of bt I’m sure could learn a great deal from – Donald Trump. I think he was actually quoting someone else when he said it, but that only adds more weighting to the words – “Never, ever, ever give up”. If pursuing your ideas was easy then there wouldn’t be any value in it as everyone could do it all the time. In order to see it through I”ve got to be persistent and really stick it out. There’s no point doing things like this by halves, I’m either all in and really backing myself or there’s no point in doing it. Also everyone faces challenges and trials everyday all over the worlds. If I were born into poverty mine would be to find enough water or nutritious food or avoid beatings from drunken parents. But as it is, I’m thankfully not in either of those situations and my challenge will be to remain strong when someone who I approach turns me down or ridicules my idea.

On a more personal level and perhaps a more selfish level, I would like my idea to work so I can show other people. I deliberately didn’t tell too many people my plans in New York as I felt a bit silly saying it – in brief words it sounds a bit whimsical. Of those that I did tell some were supportive others said supportive things and others gave off a vibe that said “that is so cute that you have an idea, it’s not a very good idea and it won’t bring you much success, but good on you for having one”. So it would be fantastic to make a go of it if only so I don’t look like a dill.

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